Bulletin Board Nonsense

Post for: #weapons (59 Posts)

Don't Let It Go To Your Head

May 18, 2025 Greg Jensen
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"Don't get well too soon. Your suffering is an inspiration to us all." -Ashleigh Brilliant
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You And I Are Destined To Do This Forever

May 12, 2025 Greg Jensen
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"SAMUS: Ridley killed my parents. RIDLEY: One time!" -Awkward Zombie (2014-09-21)
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Looong, Looong, Swoooooords!

May 10, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Think I might need both hands for this one.
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An Afternoon Rampage

April 29, 2025 Greg Jensen
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A sword hath sharpness to slay a savage beast, or butcher innocent folk.
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Snabra Kadabra

April 28, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Any magic worth doing is worth doing in jealously-guarded secrecy.
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Man You Bat-tle Stations!

April 17, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Our hero is about to shine out like a shaft of gold when all around it is dark.
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Super-Effective Against Fire-Types

April 15, 2025 Greg Jensen
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It don't matter where you parade. You better plan for rain, just in case.
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Precision Ordinance

April 12, 2025 Greg Jensen
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"One well-placed bomb could ruin my whole day." -Ashleigh Brilliant
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The Wound Wolves

April 6, 2025 Greg Jensen
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It's going to take a lot more than that to stop them.
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The Artist-To-Fascist Pipeline

March 31, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Beware those who worship aesthetics but seem to have very little to say of substance.
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Fortune Favors The Informed

March 9, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Everything old is new again, so in a way, there's already a preliminary chart of the territory.
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Mine's Bigger

March 7, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Yours is fine, though. Nothing wrong with yours being smaller.
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Reluctant Felines

March 1, 2025 Greg Jensen
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"You want me to do what? No way, get meow'da here."
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Layers Upon Layers Of Protection

January 23, 2025 Greg Jensen
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Surely, this will be sufficient! (It wasn't.)
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Not Nearly As Organized As They'd Have You Believe

January 20, 2025 Greg Jensen
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The trick is to work to keep their disorganization from becoming a feature rather than a bug.
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Radical Deployment Of Nonlethal Measures

January 7, 2025 Greg Jensen
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A curious war. The only way to win is not to kill.
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I Said, "Boom, Boom, Boom," Now Lemme Hear Ya Say Way-o!

December 2, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Invaders beware: This Kasbah's ready to rock back.
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Fog On Command

November 13, 2024 Greg Jensen
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This little cloud of mine, I'm going to make it thine.
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What's Up (In The Sky), Gamers?

September 25, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Let me tell you, when these gummies hit, they *really hit!*
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Me & The Old Battle Ax

September 15, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Crowds part when I go out on the town with my ball & chain.
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The Leverati

September 10, 2024 Greg Jensen
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When the only tool you've got is a lever, every problem looks like a fulcrum.
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Tales Of The Lance(s)

July 2, 2024 Greg Jensen
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I'm hearing a lot of good things about, I think they're called "Lancers?" All the rage, I hear.
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Hammerclangers

June 22, 2024 Greg Jensen
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"What do we make? Motherfucker, we make *money!*"
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Snicker-Snackin'

June 21, 2024 Greg Jensen
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All it takes is a bit of the old one-two, one-two!
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A Most Dangerous Game To Hunt

June 15, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Watch as I inject this code straight to its root.
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Tools Must Always Be Evaluated For Their Power To Oppress

June 14, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Marx: "Don't you know the emancipation of the working classes can only be achieved by the working classes themselves?" Lenin: "No, but if you hum a few bars I'll try and fake it."
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I Won't Need My Treads To Dispose Of You

May 24, 2024 Greg Jensen
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United, she sits. Divided, we fall. LOL, owned.
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War Is A Decades-Long Tasting Menu Best Served Cold

May 5, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Raise the iron curtain on the first of many acts, but never lower your guard!
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Splitting Hairs

April 29, 2024 Greg Jensen
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I think you'll find that the meaning this duel takes depends entirely on where I cleave things.
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Multiattack (Monster) vs. Duelist

April 28, 2024 Greg Jensen
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In today's 'Feat Head-To-Head,' we'll be comparing two different options for spicing up your NPCs
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The Dream Of The 1390s Is Alive In The 1990s

April 26, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Come to the fortified city of Provins, guaranteed to be safe from armies with small-to-moderate siege capabilities!
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Very Dangerous At Short Distances

April 16, 2024 Greg Jensen
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"Come closer. Closer." (Whispers in your ear) "Now fight me like a man."
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The Waiting Is All

March 30, 2024 Greg Jensen
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These ladies aren't going anywhere. It is the world around them that will change.
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When We Said, "Grab Your Gear And Make Ready," You Know That's Not What We Meant

February 22, 2024 Greg Jensen
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The centaurs have been over this before, but sometimes the spirit of jazz is too strong to partake in archery. Fortunately, someone brought a spare bow.
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Chaotic Weevil

February 1, 2024 Greg Jensen
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The essence of the chaotic alignment is a little less conversation, a little more mayhem.
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All Claw No Chill

January 31, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Just sit back and let them do all the cutting.
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Defeating The Irresistible Force With A Movable Object

January 27, 2024 Greg Jensen
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A charging armored knight is no match for a nude longbowman whose aim is true.
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Before There Can Be A Sword, There Must Be A Hammer

January 22, 2024 Greg Jensen
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From blunt force all sharp things are made.
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Can't Miss If You Don't Aim

January 18, 2024 Greg Jensen
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"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and, whatever you hit, call it the target." -Ashleigh Brilliant
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Be Vewy Vewy Quiet

January 16, 2024 Greg Jensen
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They say you can kill over 200 pounds of rabbit and bison with just 1 Bullets card. Is that really true?!
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Gonna Right Some Wrongs

January 10, 2024 Greg Jensen
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Together, these two owls break the law to get justice.
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More Often Than Not, Everybody Loses

December 16, 2023 Greg Jensen
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A duel is when two people agree that the other person dying is more important that keeping oneself alive.
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The Chroma Champion

December 14, 2023 Greg Jensen
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This gnome's got a sword, and a dog, and a wardrobe that just don't quit.
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After The Fusion Dance

November 29, 2023 Greg Jensen
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The aftermath of deuterium and tritium loving not wisely, but too well.
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It's Simple. We Kill The Bardman.

November 1, 2023 Greg Jensen
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A salamander fires an alcohol-based superhero out of a cannon at William Shakespeare. You know, like you do.
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A Well-Regulated Mewlitia

September 26, 2023 Greg Jensen
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For thousands of years, cats have had homes. Now, they have demands.
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Start 'em Small

September 17, 2023 Greg Jensen
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A diminutive kobold is ready for training with the swordmaster.
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I Suppose We All Thought That, One Way Or Another

September 14, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Three imposing figures consider their respective blades.
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Pew, Pew, Fight The Powah!

September 5, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Assassinate the Imperator with the power of light!
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Many Sword > Master Sword

June 22, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Link meets his match in the Sword Hoarder.
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An Amateur Can't Fight A Guy Who Does It Two-Handed. It's Like An Ant Fighting God

June 4, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Few people today realize that King Charles the First had specialized in dual-wielding.
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All This For A Girl

May 18, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Good? Bad? She's the girl with the gun.
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When We Were Frabjous

April 10, 2023 Greg Jensen
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One, two! One, two! And through and through the vorpal blade went snicker-snack! She left it dead, and with its head she went galumphing back.
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The Arrows Of Outrageous Fortune

March 28, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Are the arms I'm supposed to take up against a sea of trouble... the very arrows I've already had the fortune of receiving?
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Or Rewrite History

March 4, 2023 Greg Jensen
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A continental mystic of some notoriety seeks to complete a quest amidst an array of assets and obstacles.
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Better Revenge Than Living Well

February 27, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Swan atop the battlement, Goose down on the pavement.
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Make Every Shot Count

January 26, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Five enemies defeated and only one round left to defeat the resulting sadness.
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Enemies To Lovers

January 8, 2023 Greg Jensen
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Kings and queens brandish their weapons, but in a sensual way.
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Perhaps More In The Visigoth Sense

December 14, 2022 Greg Jensen
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A cowled girl with a battle axe races across a tennis court to seek revenge as Ayk Danroyd looks on.
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