Back to the homestead we go! We'll get along great if you stand *right* over there. Feels like making progress toward the goal is harder than ever. These dogs do *not* have a job. My boots! My boots! My controlling shares for my boots! Feel like a winner; where air is thinner; take it from me. Some dogs are created more orb than others. Conviction is a terrible thing to concede. Or angry? Or ready for dessert? Never mind what's fueling my unstoppable flurry of blows. Keep your finger on the X button, this sequence is brutal, and it goes on *forever*! The committee of independent consultants has decreed: It kinda seems like an extra city would just be redundant. Not sure how you can be so salty but not salt your password tables. Sometimes, it's nice to visit a theme park whose theme is modest sincerity. Let me tell you, when these gummies hit, they *really hit!* The bigger they are, the harder these little guys bring them down. I don't know where this idea comes from that we're the quiet types. We're chattin' about delicious mortals all the time! All it takes is just one dropship, order yours today! "I hope you'll excuse my cheap wit, but the hour is late and it's all I have left." -A humble crow. Maybe you can't take it all with you, but this paraphernalia's gonna let me bring 'em all back! A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Hope you had a pleasant recuperation!" It's almost as though what the heart wants is not necessarily precisely what the body needs. This design is also available on one of our commidi-tees, available in the gift shop! RIP to Laurent de Brunhoff (1925-2024), who carried the torch for a father taken from him far too early. "What do we make? Motherfucker, we make *money!*" The future is not yet determined, but we may know ourselves in the present moment. "Surely someone can just buy some carbon offsets to make up the difference," they said as they struggled to understand one another. Robots! We're doing our part(s)! Things aren't going so hot for these amateur rocketeers! United, she sits. Divided, we fall. LOL, owned. "Just make sure you don't leave this one out overnight like you did your last bike." Why work together to accomplish something, when you can shun the company of others and complain to strangers? I think you'll find that the meaning this duel takes depends entirely on where I cleave things. My health is assured! I'm gonna live forever! "Are these dreams a clutch of stifled memories? Was there something in my mind? There are things they say man was not meant to know... Is this shadow out of time?" -The Darkest of the Hillside Thickets, "Some Things Man Was Not Meant To Know" (2007). *On the Fresh Grave of Your Lifelong Love Who died of Consumption and Being Found the Next Morning Unconscious, Naked, and Nearly Frozen to Death by the Groundskeeper. "Dinosaurs are not dead! Dinosaurs are life!" "Now, you say you spell 'slaadi' with two As? Fascinating." The beauty of analog systems is that you can always given 'em a good hip check if they're not behaving! "Sinuously erect?" Looks, *New Aeon*, you said it not me. "Words are a wonderful form of communication, but they will never replace kisses and punches." -Ashleigh Brilliant You can't even call him Mr. Potato Head anymore. Because of woke. Teach a monkey to shoot, and they'll paint on a grimmer, grander canvas for the rest of their lives. The streets of the old city are teeming with schemers, miscreants, and those just trying to get through the day. I emerged from the disorienting journey changed in ways I could not have anticipated. A place for every color and every color in its place (not you, pink). The centaurs have been over this before, but sometimes the spirit of jazz is too strong to partake in archery. Fortunately, someone brought a spare bow. Machines should do the work. That's what they're best at. People should do the thinking. That's what they're best at. All the armaments known to the artist that are mightier than the sword. SNAKE FARM SNAKE FARM SNAKE FARM These feathered fellows bring the "smash" to "smashing the chains of the oppressed." Just sit back and let them do all the cutting. Are you telling me that cats dressed as finely as we should feel hunger? Preposterous! "Reach for a book and you touch the stars," they said. "As above, so below," they said. And look at us now! Sure would be a shame if we took these, the only remaining Talismans, into the Valley with us! A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "The animals will feel an overwhelming peace descend when you are around." "To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and, whatever you hit, call it the target." -Ashleigh Brilliant They say you can kill over 200 pounds of rabbit and bison with just 1 Bullets card. Is that really true?! "Tutto quello a cui riesco a pensare è prendere altre patatine!" -Every seagull in Venice, probably. Ah, Paris. City of love, city of cake. Who keeps so many birds in boxes?! Sunset with the girls. What's not to love? Zardoz gets to play Santa this year. The results are surprisingly heartwarming! A shady ne'er-do-well pulls himself from the ocean only to discover more than he bargained for. A duel is when two people agree that the other person dying is more important that keeping oneself alive. It's a chimeracle! Oh, they laughed at me at the academy, but who's laughing now?! Hold me closer, dabbing Lancer! If you do it with a twist. Yes, artistically. Surely reading all this trashy gossip isn't bad for me! Don't get it twisted, the bozo on the horse knows what he did. Even your sharpest barbs aren't making it past this armor. Something about them all, can't quite put my finger on it... Long after the collapse of the imperial core, a long and cryptic shadow is still cast by its ghosts. Person: "Guys! What if everyone got replaced by robots and I'm the last real person left?" Narrator: "He was." "In the final analysis, everything depends on everything else." -Ashleigh Brilliant These are *original* vampire characters, they are *not Dracula*! Look out everyone, Drawfee is being horny on main again, and the community is *wound up*. A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "The pets are happy for your safe return." ’Tis now the very witching time of night, when churchyards yawn and hell itself breathes out contagion to this world. Now could we drink hot blood, and do such bitter business as the day would quake to look on. "If we all work together, we can totally disrupt the system" -Ashleigh Brilliant. A pink zebra is looking to get a trio of animals drunk; only the one with the worst judgment is interested. The Great Wheel is the hottest date spot for singles in all of Paris. Lady in stone, her crew made of bone. It's hot in this desert, it's boring, and it's time to go home! The future corpses of America face down the power behind the throne. These cats are cross, so leave 'em be. Three royals ladies, three noble creatures. Loose lips cost souls. An unfortunate king drowns as a snake and an angel look on in alarm. The next move you make could be your next. Cats inspired by box chart a course to become box. Truly, it's good to be alive. An especially fresh fortress is appreciated more by its onlookers than by its inhabitant. Ooh, let's slip that gap! Hell is empty, and all the bastards are here. It is by your hand that the truth will be revealed to you. "Please turn down the volume or play something other than Drake." A royal crow announces, "Hooray! A brand spankin' new place to work!" A dog is astonished. The sages agree: Ancient Egypt is pretty cool. Two string-instrument artists struggle with and dwell on their art. Mazeppa regrets riding bareback in the company of much wilder ruffians. This place is just chock full of dogs! The painting spoke to me, and only to me, and fell to me to rescue her. The desert is full of strange and wondrous visions. I'll cut more off than a nose before I'm done with you. It's plane to see that it's all geometry. Some vampires being spooky, in a glamorous, aspirational way. "It’s not the job of the artist to give the audience what the audience wants. If the audience knew what they needed, then they wouldn’t be the audience. They would be the artists. It is the job of artists to give the audience what they need." -Alan Moore, 2007 "Don't do something we're both going to regret." Good? Bad? She's the girl with the gun. Ain't no rule say that dogs can't take baths. A whale's song is sometimes a plea to find a point of reference. Behold some freaks who always thinks with their tentacle ganglia. Think about it. Have you ever *seen* your skull? Or anyone else's, for that matter? What girls want: Trash & Cats. "Normal times may possibly be over forever." -Ashleigh Brilliant This ad dares to ask: What is Napoleon... was a refrigerator? Look at these little scamps! What possible trouble could they get into? (Narrator: They would get into a lot of trouble.) In the mind of the creature, fly away from here, from this human cognition to the Umwelts that are near. Are the arms I'm supposed to take up against a sea of trouble... the very arrows I've already had the fortune of receiving? "I have just discovered the truth, and can't understand why everybody isn't eager to hear it." -Ashleigh Brilliant A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "I will eventually invent a time machine." You don't know what you ask, traveler. My spiciest takes will kill a dragon, let alone a host. You'd better go to a guest that shares milder takes. Three dogs in a circle greet one another. Hop in your time machine and come to the Bad Apple, serving customers from 2011 to 2012. "It is unbelievable that this stubborn darkness, this eternal eclipse, this flaw in geometry, this eternal cloud on virgin truth can be endured." -Farkas Bolyai, c. 1825. It's the landing. “They are real, and that’s why I will never work out that hard again, because nobody wanted to believe they were real." -Nicholas Cage, 2022 Is this a dog I see before me? Or is it three? Seems, nay, 'tis a split in my vision. Bet I can fit this whole book in my mouth! "The Thousand And One Nights is not something which has died. It is a book so vast that it is not necessary to have read it, for it is a part of out memory." -Tim Rogers (2020) quoting Eliot Weinberger's (1984) translation of Jorge Luis Borges (1980). It's a cloudy day, but this kitty's not going to get caught unprepared. Nobody can resist your Stromboli dynamism. L’ENRÉGISTREMENT ÉLECTRIQUE LE PLUS PERFECTIONNÉ Every zoo is a heavy petting zoo if you're brave enough. All soft horses, no straight lines. A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Everyone is delighted that we're bound by that pact." The quest for knowledge is an infinite game played by finite creatures. "Why'd they make that drawer so hot?!" The world isn't getting smaller. Every part of it is simply accelerating toward you. "When a man tries to see into the distance, what does he do? He narrows his eyes." -Katsuhiro Otomo, 1987 A royal crow announces, "Hooray! A significant personal accomplishment!" A dog is astonished. Three eggs. Or is it four? "What we all dread most is a maze with no center." -G. K. Chesterton, 1913 Two masked and robed individuals recline in a gondola, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." The capybara is a singularly luminous animal, and space aliens have concerns. A single powerful tome can have the weight of a whole stack of fluff. You have been greeted by an inhabitant of the Moon. A man grasps at an arrow in his back, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." The animals are immune to rhetoric. An angel points at a skull, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "It's time to sleep in to commemorate the New Year!" A man creates/discovers the world, while a giant speaks/is silent. Several unnerving horse-like entities. The hottest take of all time is also literally the most superficial. Seven knives pierce an apple, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." They call me Pitopotamus, my kisses are bottomless. A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Will you explain your mind?" A postal cat swipes at a postal rat, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A dog dreams, calmly and cozily, of what it is like to be a dog. A harlequin reclines on bench below the stage. Cats playing golf, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "According to this article I read, 84% of people are thankful for your existence!" A man is nuzzled by a sphinx. Amish women rise a horse-drawn carriage into Intercourse, Pennsylvania, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A cowled girl with a battle axe races across a tennis court to seek revenge as Ayk Danroyd looks on. A shadowy figure beside a table looks out over a desert, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." Cats demonstrate a variety of emotions through pose, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A person holding a brilliant lantern aloft, with a speech bubble saying, "holy crap." Movie poster for Manon Des Sources, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A tuxedoed gentleman appears with a winged alchemical symbol. Eight ants circle on a Moebius band, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "The animals are eventually going to confirm my suspicions." Opus the penguin tries and fails to fly, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A person stands with their head bisected, with a speech bubble saying, "holy crap." A green monkey clutches his bananas, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "It's time to perfunctorily send a card for Halloween!" A giant squid with a chicken's head attack's attacks fictional submarine The Nautilus, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A wanderer stands above a sea of fog, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A man crouches in order to demonstrate to a dog how to defecate. A surfer tips off the crest of a wave, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." Dr. Strange is attacked by a monster, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A mysterious woman nibbles at a butter biscuit. A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "The animals will reflect on our shared humanity until the world forgets our names." A sixteenth century depiction of an autopsy, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A Hippopotamus cast in bronze, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A wolf looks on. A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Will you accept my emotional outburst?" A man holding a and puppet aloft, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." Various dogs, with an imperative to "Vote Dog." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Just a friendly note to say how are you!" Two theatrical stars are pressed into a dispute over a crown, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." Saint George, having broken his lance, swings a sword at a dragon, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A Chinese print of a bird, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." A multi-purpose greeting card configured to read, "Hope you will have a successful semester!" The Eiffel Tower, manipulated to appear upside-down, with a speech bubble saying, "oh no." 
